Today I had an interesting conversation about spirituality with a friend who spent a lot of time with a spiritual teacher in India. The core of those teachings was that the ultimate goal of development in our life is to actualize ourselves as beings of pure love.
Not an easy task, given our challenges and relationships on Earth these days. But I couldn´t agree more.
All too often, our concept of spirituality consists of tools and procedures. We believe we are spiritual when we use oracle cards, divination tools, mantras, meditations, incense, psychic readings, affirmations, vision boards, stones and crystals, clairvoyance, shamanistic and tantric techniques, plant medicine, or whatever.
These things can be useful to a degree, but they don´t make us “spiritual”. If we stay on that level and don´t move deeper towards our human core and the potential for our Spirit´s growth here on Earth, ultimately, they function as distractions. One of my teachers has coined the term “brain candy”.
Something that gives your brain an excuse to create an interesting story, something mental to chew on. But things there remain in the mental realm or the realm of fantasy.
Not being connected with the realm of physicality, the realm of action, the 3D experience on Earth, and the pain, challenges, and learning that come with it.
I remember a related conversation I had with another friend a couple of years ago. At that time she was facing serious financial challenges and her business and life were pretty much falling apart. She was close to being broke. She was of course devastated and desperate. At one point she attended a gathering with other colleagues from her line of coaching business, where the participants tried to surpass each other in telling others how successfully they have manifested large sums of money, lots of clients, and business success. When she was asked about her status, she sheepishly had to admit that her business had crashed and she was almost broke.
Needless to say, she got quite a few looks, since her narrative did not fit the success narrative of the other participants. She felt unhappy and upset and wondered what on Earth she was doing wrong since her life should take such a downturn and she couldn´t manifest anything positive for herself anymore.
When we met after the event and she told me about the experience and asked my advice, I smiled and said to her: “Congratulations!!! Life is really taking you into apprenticeship now.
The more intensive problems get, the better the learning process!”. She didn´t know what to make of it. But what I meant was that she was finally moving from the field of superficial “spirituality” focused on manifesting specific goals dictated by the mental level, towards the field of self-actualization and greater learning. And we learn best when the going gets rough. Because you simply have to learn a new and more advanced set of spiritual skills to get through the situation.
It is easy to love and accept your life and your self-image when everything works perfectly in your life. There are no challenges. Things just turn out great for you. But when you lose all you have, your business crashes, you end up broke, need to sell your home, a dear one dies, you lose your partner, lose your customers, or whatever seemingly “negative” story Life chooses to play out for you as a learning tool, how do you react? How do you cope? Do you develop a love of life and respect for yourself despite the challenges, or do you crash mentally and emotionally?
Do you blame life or God for whatever calamity you are going through, or do you start developing resilience and start seeing the bigger picture? Are you able to feel gratitude for the learning process even though everything is collapsing around you? Can you find alternative points of view and seemingly impossible solutions, or do you drown?
Do you react with fear or do you choose to be brave and trust the process, even though you have no idea how it ends? Can you still be content, loving, and forgiving when you are down emotionally or have been betrayed and hurt by others?
At this point, you have the perfect opportunity to develop a deeper and more authentic version of spirituality. The one that honors accepts and chooses to love Life in all its forms, warts, and all 
Regardless of the story Life presents you with.
Regardless of the story Life presents you with.This is a version of spirituality that does not rely on external tools and practices. It relies only on the growing power of your Spirit and believe me, that is more than enough!
It is in this moment that you make the first step to truly becoming a being of pure Love. For Love accepts everything, shuns nothing. and is eternally grateful for every aspect of your earthly experience, no matter how pleasant or painful. It is all a growing and learning process after all.